It feels like a hundred years since I reached out through a blog post. Writing is, and has always been, one of the most effective ways I can totally detach from the world and settle into really enjoying the beauty and joy of life. I have thoroughly appreciated the opportunity to share my thoughts, my hopes and my unending gratitude through these posts, as well as chronicling this unusual journey that has chosen me. I would like to think it’s the other way around and that I chose the path, but in reality, it totally chose me. I really didn’t have a lot of say in the matter!
This will be my second January in the florist life cycle. A time of year where florists usually slow right down on actual orders, and the mania of the holiday season seems a distant memory. The last of the pine cones have been stashed away for next years’ wreaths and most of the glue gun injuries of the past few weeks have had time to heal. It’s an opportunity to recharge, spend some quality time with friends and family, sleep, catch up on the latest celebrity gossip, sleep some more, and shower on a more regular basis. What I have also noticed, is that it’s a moment where you can actually sit back and review the work you’ve done over the last year. This, is an incredible thing. Sitting back and actually going through your personal portfolio of work is…a really unbelievable activity to engage in. At least I find it is. I’ll tell you why.
I still have trouble thinking that this is what I am allowed to do for a living. I struggle with my confidence as a designer, usually on the daily. I worry over pricing. I have this heart wrenching fear that the bride won’t like her bouquet. I have nightmares the fridge will give out on the hottest day of the year. I’m constantly aware of the market price of David Austen roses. I’ve given up my love of manicures. I have a collection of buckets in every room of my house. And in the middle of this jumble of chaos and fear and panic, I’m actually living the life of a real florist! The actual beauty of the work that I do accomplish can easily get lost in all of that junk. So by the time the holidays roll around, I haven’t once taken the time to sit back and really dive in and marvel at the level of my talents, the amazing-ness of our clients, the excitement of some of the projects I was a part of, and the sheer magic of our achievements. It’s a real brain buster! But it’s also the thing that makes the worrying and sleepless nights, missed meals, post-poned vacations, raw fingers, long days, longer nights and moments of “What the hell am I doing????” all completely and utterly worth it.
It’s so important to remind ourselves how great we can be. Not in an “I’m so much better than that florist” kind of way. We are all different and offer diverse levels of expertise and art. We all have differing levels of skill and vision, and I have always firmly believed that if I can’t deliver on something, it’s better to be upfront about it and recommend someone that can. But looking back and admiring the hard work and dedication you’ve dished out over the last year is incredibly motivating and a real nice pat on the back. Look at you kid, you really are a star!
Maybe it’s because I’m still so new at this (although I feel a lot less new at it than just my 2.5 years) and the weary ways of the floral world has not taken its toll on my spirit yet. Maybe it’s due to the fact that all my clients have spoiled me and been really exceptional people who have allowed me to be creatively free and trusted my design judgement from the word go. It might even be partly due to the amazing florists around me, who have graciously shared their bodies of work with the world, letting the rest of us be truly inspired and awed by their accomplishments, driving us forward in our own endeavours.
Whatever the motivation behind it is, I’m just a pretty lucky gal who is sitting back on this snowy Tuesday, with a hot cup of coffee, taking it all in. There is a lot of work and planning to get to, as we start to plan for the upcoming wedding season, as well as a little time off for a special delivery due at the end of February (HT takes on Baby!!!) but for today it’s all about me and the flowers. How we speak to each other, how we dance together, how sweet it all is. Thank you for supporting us through another incredible year, and I look forward with anticipation to the beauty, love and flowers that lie ahead.